Reckless vow, p.25
Reckless Vow, page 25
Jesse moved his head to look around the official, and with one more glance, I gave a small shake of my head.
And left.
CHAPTER 24
HESTIA
Lottie pulled a T-shirt from my case in silence, holding it up before handing it to me.
‘This one okay?’ she asked, her voice wavering as I looked back at her, knowing my eyes were as blank as I felt.
I took it from her outstretched hand, forcing it over my head. She helped me pull my hair free, smoothing it down without a word as I shifted to watching the one big screen visible from the truck, on the edge of the arena. It was still the bronc riders competing, being tossed around like rag dolls, the roar of the crowd rumbling through the frame of the truck.
‘Now tell me exactly what he said,’ Lottie said, clearing her throat a little and pushing her own hair back.
I turned to her, my mind still working in slow motion. A smudge of dirt on her cheek remained from when she’d fallen in the dirt for me, for no fucking reason at all.
‘Not a lot,’ I answered quietly, reaching out to wipe it away with my thumb. She eyed me, watching carefully. ‘That poisonous little bitch was doing her best to distract him.’ Remembering, I felt the first threads of emotion since I’d walked out of the stadium half an hour earlier. ‘He just said, “Don’t go,” but . . .’ I stopped, hardening myself to everything in my gut that threatened to spill up and over. ‘The officials were talking to him. Half the people in the area were watching. I didn’t want to make it worse, so . . . I left.’
Lottie bit her lip, looking up at the screen.
‘There’s no way we’re going to get back by the chutes again,’ she murmured, a calculating expression in her eyes. ‘But there’s something you need to know. Please don’t be angry,’ she began, wincing as I stared. Forcing myself to soften my gaze, I shook my head.
‘Don’t be a dick, Lottie. I can’t ever be angry with you, not really.’
She ventured a small smile.
‘I, um . . . I called Cal last night,’ she started, taking in my surprise. ‘We spoke for a while. Mainly it was him apologizing, regretting everything that happened in the past few weeks. But I also asked him to do something for me. For you, I mean.’
I opened my mouth to speak, but no words came out.
‘I asked him to call Jesse, to leave a voicemail and explain, in his words, what he did at your flat. When he pretended you guys were back in a relationship.’
‘Oh, holy fuck,’ I breathed, the potential for Cal making everything so much worse amplified.
Lottie shook her head, grabbing my hands with hers as she smiled.
‘No, Hes. It worked. Cal called me back when it was done, said he’d rambled until the voicemail had cut him off but he’d made sure it was clear nothing was happening between you two. That you deserved a real love, someone who could really return it.’
I swallowed. I couldn’t quite bring myself to believe Cal would do something like that.
‘Oh . . .’ was all I could manage, not able to compute the dawning happiness in her eyes.
‘But it was the call I got from Jesse early this morning that meant I knew everything would be okay,’ she reassured, as my hands tightened around hers, eyes darting across her face, desperate to read her expression. ‘He said he understood what’d happened, to pass my thanks on to Cal, and . . . tell you that he’d call straight after the rodeo. That he was booking tickets to fly to London, leaving tomorrow. That he can’t live without you. I didn’t want to say anything before, because I thought he’d get a chance to tell you himself, in person. But . . . well, obviously it didn’t quite turn out like that.’
I choked then, the sobs rising up more quickly than I could push them back.
‘It’s going to be okay,’ she said, holding tight as I struggled to gather myself. ‘What just happened, whatever’s going on with Chrissy . . . he wants you, Hes. He’s in love with you – he has been for ages. That doesn’t just go away, no matter what she says or wants.’
I let myself cry then, the relief reducing my body to jelly, leaning against Lottie as she held me.
It took some time to gather myself, to work up to sorting out my face and getting back out.
‘Are you sure you want to watch?’ she asked as we walked slowly back over to the entrance. It was now completely clear, everyone already inside. ‘We could just wait round the back, for when he’s done?’
I swallowed, trying a weak smile.
‘If I’m going to be with a bull rider, I’ve got to get used to this, right?’ I said, brushing off her excitement. I couldn’t quite picture it all yet, despite what she’d told me.
We re-entered, this time picking up a couple of beers as we made our way to the stands. It was clear that finding a seat would be impossible now.
‘You okay to just lean here?’ I said, and she nodded. We had a clear view of both the area itself and one of the screens.
We watched the end of the bronc riding. My pulse was thundering as they finally announced the bull riding, listing out some of the competitors.
‘. . . And from Jackson Hole, Wyoming’s golden boy, right back on the circuit after a year off – it’s Jesse Bennington!’
The camera panned to the chutes. Jesse pinched the brim of his hat as he sat astride one of the gates, the cast on his wrist visible below the cuff of his shirt. His face was set firm, every inch the Old Hollywood star, as the crowd roared – a very noticeable female contingent screaming from the stand we were in.
Lottie smiled at me, her mouth twitching as I rolled my eyes.
‘His ego is going to be insufferable,’ I said, sipping on my beer but unable to hide my own smile.
‘I don’t think he’ll give a fuck now you’re home,’ she replied over the noise of the next announcement. The first rider was climbing into the bull pen, already struggling as the animal did its level best to smash him against the steel bars.
I shivered, folding my arm round myself, wishing I could go back there again and force Jesse to leave – just pull him right out of there and never look back.
Trying to distract myself, I focused on Lottie’s words: the way she’d said home, even though this was neither hers nor mine. But then, neither was London, technically. And it sure as fuck wasn’t that miserable hole in the Surrey suburbs where I’d grown up with my stepfather.
But this place – Jackson – had begun to feel something like home, even though I was barely more than a tourist. Turning it over and over, it wasn’t until I glanced back up at the big screen as the announcer talked through the upcoming riders in more detail, the camera settling on Jesse one more time, that I suddenly got it.
With a jolt that felt almost physical, I realized it was the people, the connections I’d made, that gave me a sense of being at home here. That home could simply be people – a person – not necessarily a place, felt like a revelation so huge that when Jesse glanced up into the stands, his eyes tracking across the seats, it took everything I had not to run up to the ledge and jump up and down like a fucking lunatic until he saw me.
I knew then, reaching over to give Lottie a brief but hard hug and kiss her temple, why it felt like more than love for Jesse.
He felt like home.
‘What was that for?’ Lottie smiled, a quizzical expression blooming as the first rider was released out of the gate.
We both winced as he hung on for dear life – but with a particularly evil buck he was unseated, tumbling down into the dirt. The crowd groaned and began to clap as he walked away unscathed, the wranglers in the arena forcing the bull away into its pen.
‘For never giving up on me,’ I replied, all but shouting into her ear over the noise.
‘I’ve always got you,’ she shouted back, her eyes fierce. ‘You’re never alone, Hes. Especially not now.’ She gestured towards Jesse, now visible as he sat on top of the gate.
I fought back more tears as I nodded, focusing on breathing steadily as I realized he was up next.
‘What’s the prize money for this, then? If he does win?’ I asked, my thoughts drifting to his mum and what a difference this could make to her alone.
‘It’s a big one,’ she said, also transfixed by the sight of Jesse in the pen, adjusting his left-handed grip, raising his right hand slowly. ‘If he wins outright, it’s a hundred and fifty thousand dollars. And I wouldn’t be surprised if the sponsors come rolling back in. Cole told me Ariat and Wrangler have come knocking in previous years, and that’s big money.’
‘Shit,’ I murmured, feeling a mix of pride in Jesse’s obvious skill and utter terror as the announcer proclaimed his bull to be something of a Livingston Peak legend, known for his vicious temper.
‘Hold my hand,’ Lottie instructed, waiting for me to grip it tightly. ‘It’s just eight seconds, then it’s over.’
We waited, everything else forgotten as the screens zoomed in, the bull fighters in the arena assuming their positions. Then, with a crack, the gate swung open, the crowd roaring in response.
Everything stopped. My body became stone, only my eyes able to move as I watched Jesse – the person I’d crossed half the world for, the man I loved, my home – on the back of something that could kill him.
The bull leapt clear of the ground, the huge digital timer above the arena counting up towards eight. Each second felt like a lifetime. But Jesse held on, his bound right arm raised just high enough despite the injury, utterly in line with each twist and turn of the bull. The crowd was screaming, the announcer proclaiming an incredible ride, when the buzzer sounded – and in one smooth motion, Jesse leapt off and landed with perfect ease in the dirt.
I let go of my breath as everyone around us shot to their feet, Lottie yelling with them. But in the next second, as Jesse turned to grin at the crowd, the bull – still spinning and bucking – turned too. And as Jesse pivoted to get out of the way, the bull put its head down and slammed him, side on, into the steel barrier.
He crumpled to the ground. A collective gasp made its way round the stadium as Lottie screamed his name, looking back at me as my legs began to give way.
‘Oh my God,’ I choked, leaning on her, my hands grasping at the wall beside us as the bull fighters rushed over to him. Seconds later, the bull was secured and paramedics ran out into the arena. ‘Oh fuck, Lottie, no, no, no . . .’
‘It’s okay. It’ll be okay,’ she cried, but the uncertainty in her voice made what little strength remained in my body give way.
‘Is she all right, ma’am?’
I heard voices coming closer, felt Lottie shaking as she held onto me, refusing to let go.
‘C’mon now, honey, stay with us,’ a new voice said. ‘She ever pass out before like this?’
My head whirled, my pulse pounding as cool hands touched my forehead for a moment, fingers pressed to my wrist.
‘Jesse – the bull rider just out there – she’s his . . . girlfriend.’
‘Oh, damn. Okay. C’mon, sweetheart,’ the voice said. ‘Let’s get you some air. Jesse’s gonna be just fine. Looks like he’s conscious, okay? He’s doing better than you right now.’
Seconds later, I was blinking up into the face of a stranger, a woman with a kind expression. She was holding out a bottle of water. I took it, my hand trembling. The arena was still spinning.
She talked to Lottie for a minute, discussing what to do with me as I turned my head, craning my neck for a look at the big screen. Only a corner was visible from this angle, but I could see Jesse being led out – walking, but heavily supported on one side.
‘A terrifying end to one of the best rides we’ve seen in the past year! The score to beat!’ the announcer roared. The crowd was clapping as Jesse left.
‘I want to see him,’ I murmured to Lottie, feeling her hesitate for a moment. ‘Please – I’ll be fine, I just need to see him.’
I gritted my teeth as she pulled me up, assisted by two others, and thanked them as we slowly walked out.
‘You scared the shit out of me,’ she said, letting out a shaky breath.
‘Sorry,’ I replied, attempting a small smile as my balance slowly returned. ‘I seriously need to toughen up to all this, don’t I?’
She exhaled, raising her eyebrows. ‘That, or a bottle of whiskey beforehand,’ she muttered, shaking her head. ‘Fucking insane sport.’
I murmured my agreement as we made our way steadily around the outside, the cooling evening air helping to dissolve the tension through my body, until . . .
‘Is that –’ I started, seeing an ambulance move in closer to the back of the building, picking up my pace as Lottie did the same.
A group of men emerged from the stadium, and there, between them, was Jesse. Still in full rodeo gear, covered in dirt.
‘Jesse!’ I yelled, not knowing if he would hear from this distance. I broke into a wobbly run as the ambulance doors opened. ‘Wait – Jesse, please!’
The men around him stopped, parting as he turned towards me.
I continued at full pace, Lottie dropping back as we neared.
‘Oh, thank fuck,’ I cried, my heart rending as he tried to smile. It turned into a grimace of pure pain as I reached him.
‘Ma’am, we need to get him to hospital,’ one of the paramedics said, trying to step in my way.
‘No, I can – let her through,’ Jesse said, wincing as he stepped towards me.
We were suddenly face to face, all of the distance, the words and the pain of the past few weeks evaporating.
‘Can you give us a minute?’ Jesse asked the group, frowning as he struggled against the pain. He released his hold on the man to his right and grasped the ambulance door instead. ‘Please.’
As they dispersed, I turned, hearing shouting behind us. Chrissy – her path blocked by Lottie, face red with rage.
‘Lottie’s got it,’ Jesse whispered, his fingers tracing my jaw, gently turning my face back towards him.
And suddenly I couldn’t speak; my eyes were filling, as his did.
‘You came back,’ he murmured, taking in my face.
‘I never really left,’ I finally admitted. The tears were falling freely now, too many to wipe away. Reaching up as he leant down, I closed my eyes as his lips met mine – the feeling I’d thought I would never have again. I almost gasped at the strength of it.
‘I love you, Jesse,’ I whispered, our mouths still touching. ‘I meant it before, even though I screamed it at you.’
He choked a laugh, wincing at the movement.
‘I know,’ he replied, stroking my cheek, kissing me again. ‘I felt it. I’m so sorry that I hung up . . . I’m so sorry about Chrissy. We didn’t . . . I mean, she wanted to, but . . .’
I shook my head, not wanting her name between us.
‘It’s okay, I don’t care. I just – I want to be with you, Jesse. I need to be where you are. Even if it’s here, watching you get fucked up by a goddamn bull.’
He tried to smile, gritting his teeth instead as he held his right arm.
‘Sir, we really need to get you to the hospital. That arm needs to be set.’
The paramedic stepped towards us and I nodded, not wanting to prolong Jesse’s pain.
‘I love you too,’ Jesse said, his gaze on mine, watching as I absorbed the words. ‘I can’t wait to make up for the weeks we missed.’
I smiled, understanding everything included within that.
‘I’ll be there, at the hospital,’ I replied, glancing at the paramedic as I stepped back. He took over as Jesse tried to smile back at me, others moving in to help him into the ambulance. I turned and headed back towards Lottie.
‘Where’s Chrissy?’ I asked, glancing around before noticing the sly smile on Lottie’s lips.
She shrugged.
‘No idea. She took one look at you guys kissing and stalked off. I mean, I did say that if she didn’t take the hint and fuck off, you would likely go full psycho, and ripped shirts would be the least of her problems.’
I laughed, the sound of it surprising us both after everything that had passed today.
‘You’re so sexy when you fuck with people,’ I said, looping my arm through hers. We turned back to the ambulance, watching them close the back doors.
‘They’ll be going up to the Peak Memorial hospital,’ she said, glancing at her phone. ‘I messaged Cole. He’s been there himself before. Says the food’s pretty good.’
I shook my head. ‘Fucking cowboys.’
And so the waiting began. An hour or so into it, surrounded by coffee and snacks, I looked up as someone approached.
‘I knew you’d come back.’
Clara held her arms out as I got up, giving her a long squeeze.
‘Your brother is a pain in my ass,’ I sighed, smiling as she chuckled.
‘Tell me about it,’ she agreed, turning to shake Lottie’s hand as I introduced them. ‘And I want you to know that I filled him in on Chrissy’s little game earlier.’ She shook her head in disgust. ‘That girl always did have a snaky side. Been that way since high school. She’s been waiting for a chance to get back with Jesse ever since he dumped her the first time.’
‘Thanks,’ I said, glancing over to the doorway as a doctor emerged, heading for us as he recognized Clara.
‘Are you Jesse Bennington’s family?’ he asked, looking between us as Clara nodded. ‘Well, he’s doing all right considering, but he’s going to need surgery on his right arm. Maybe even a plate in his shoulder. It’s pretty routine, nothing to worry about – but I’m going to need you to fill in some forms for us, for the insurance. If he has it?’
Lottie stepped forward then, nodding, offering her help as the one that dealt with payroll and benefits at the ranch.
‘I totally forgot that you have to pay for everything here,’ I said to Clara, rapidly realizing the financial implications of an injury like this.
She nodded grimly, frowning.
‘Yeah, it’s tough,’ she said, watching as Lottie went over to the administration area. ‘Even when you win. He did, by the way – I don’t know if you checked.’
